Bill Burr Tackles Cancel Culture For His ‘SNL’ Debut, While ‘The Fly’ Has Jim I do 3 minutes. Transcript of the "Philadelphia incident" where comedian Bill Burr went on a 12-minute tirade attacking the audience after the previous act was heckled heavily by the crowd. Yeah, the audience isn't full of Bill Burr fans like a normal show he would do. BILL BURR: SNL MONOLOGUE (2020) – TRANSCRIPT Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the “woke” white women. It’s gonna be amazing. That’s’ it I come out here with a fuckin gun right. This gotta be fucking ridiculous. Comedian Bill Burr's SNL monologue addressed everything from coronavirus and being 'woke' to gay pride and cancel culture, noting he'd probably be 'canceled' after his opening jokes. Is this what you want? The full transcript of Bill’s monologue at the SNL is now available. Stand-up comic and former “Breaking Bad” actor Bill Burr has ignited a Twitter firestorm — for mocking everyone from white women to gays in his first “Saturday Night Live’’ monologue. Just one after another. This doesn’t change anything. Bunch of racist fucking morons. Bunch of pussies. Thank you. I hope your fucking radios fall on your heads tomorrow. Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. Would love your thoughts, please comment. What do you have to say sir? It’s Pride month.” And I’m like, “What’s that?” I’m 52. Rainbow flags. I don’t know how they did it. Yo – I’m seguewaying into my next joke. I had a great time with Judd Apatow, Pete Davidson and all the guys. Burr then spent his 12 minute set picking apart every thing about the city from its food, its sports teams, its icons, all while receiving boos from the audience. With my SUV in my heated seats. Look at this. These are equator people. Ploughing ahead. Maybe I wouldn’t have a bunch of cunts not fuckin paying attention 4 hours into a goddamn show. And all of a sudden it went off the rails like, “Oh! You people are on goddamn acid. So, thank you so much for coming out during these difficult times. I don’t know. You bunch of fuckin cocks. I broke the mic stand. He goes, “It’s gay pride month.”And I was just like, “Oh!” Dude, you know when you’re just like, stuck in the matrix and you just can’t– [keeping his palm very close to his face.] The nerve… where’s the camera at? Bill Burr - SNL MonologueBill Burr snl#BillBurr #SNL #Monologue Can you believe that?” It’s like, “Yeah. I hope he snaps both his fuckin ankles the first goddamn game. What’s that sir? Maybe you’ll win another one. 52 fuckin hours into a show. Fuckin boo me 9 hrs. What’s that sir? Speaker Bill Burr: Thank you. Stand-up comic and former “Breaking Bad” actor Bill Burr has ignited a Twitter firestorm — for mocking everyone from white women to gays in his … 7 Mother fucking minutes left. Get the peep show back in Time Square, old people can walk safely 40 blocks away. You probably won’t even notice the fuckin difference. Dude, black people were actually enslaved, they get February. If you’re that dumb and you wanna kill your own family members, by all means, do it. “Did you hear what he said in that interview in Playboy in 1970? All rights reserved. Alright listen I’m out of time. I’m like, “What’s going on? who told bill burr he, a straight white man, should try to tackle homophobia and racism in the worst way possible in his snl monologue — ً (@wyattswoods) October 11, 2020 … Huh? Sir why are you screaming? God I hope mass aids, full blown, like fuckin you get weak as you walk to your fuckin car and you just pass out and they just find you next to your ’83 Fucking Monte Carlo with gravel imbedded into the fuckin side of your bald ass fuckin head. I got your mothers. What’s that? Thank you so much. Bill Burr came for Pride Month in his opening monologue for Saturday Night Live. And I was getting all claustrophobic. Someone tell him calling women 'bitches' isn't funny,” wrote one commenter on Twitter. You don’t know who the fuck he is. You’re all gonna get fuckin cancer which is fantastic because all your fucking heads are shaved anyway no one’s even gonna notice. Comedian Bill Burr hosted Saturday Night Live last night (with Jack White filling in as musical guest after that country nobody Morgan Wallen was dropped for acting a COVID fool), and his opening monologue gave some a case of the cringes and others a case of of the slow claps. It's 2020. You guys were here man. Coming to you straight from the Rialto Square Theatre in Joliet, IL to your seat at home! One said, “The outrage over bill burr’s SNL monologue just proves that y’alls sense of humor is officially extinct in 2020.” One critiqued, “Bill Burr was the absolute worst monologue ever - I turned off the @nbcsnl show. Right? The terrorists will never bomb you people ‘cause you’re fucking worthless and no one cares about you. Yes. The reaction to what he said undergirds white supremacy. You all gonna go see Rocky 19. Viewers may know Burr for playing Patrick Kuby in Breaking Bad, although he has also fronted comedy podcast The Monday Morning Podcast since 2007. Listen, I don’t want to speak ill of my bitches here, okay? Here's why. Be the first to rate this post. That’s what I learned. The full transcript of Bill’s monologue at the SNL is now available here. Partly because he was actually quite funny and partly because he made it through the gauntlet and didn’t back down. Grandma! Didn’t have that when I was a kid. There’s gay black people, they can celebrate from June 1st, July 31st, 61 days of celebrating. You got a fuckin ping pong team? 7 MINUTES left. This is probably the funniest SNL Monologue in a long time and it is no surprise that it offended the Twitter community. It's 2020. It ain’t ever fuckin happen. All of you mother fuckers. It had to happen. I’m gonna be the little observational comedian here. Wow, thank you. I come out here with a fuckin gun, hollow tip bullets, and I just start fuckin shooting people. Nobody wants to go on the parade. bill burr : white women, stop acting like white supremacy and racism and oppression is only something yt men benefit from , you are also complicit and have also benefitted yt women and some people on this forum : he's hurting my feelings , he's wrong You have no idea what it’s like to be me.” Trashing white guys. Bill Burr is exactly the comic we DON‘T NEED RIGHT NOW. You know? Fuck all of you and fuck the liberty bell, and shove it up Ben Franklin’s ass. So, why don’t you shut up, sit down next to me and take your talking to. So, I haven’t been in New York for about a year. You fucking assholes. I’m getting paid to shit all over you guys and your stupid fucking rock t-shirts of bands that no one gives a fuck about. I hope you all get in your Ford Focuses and fucking drive off the side of that faggot ass Ben Franklin bridge. The nerve of you white women. “My life is so hard. I gotta tell you, the way white women somehow hijacked the ‘woke’ movement, generals around the world should be analyzing this. No votes so far! What do you want? Oh, Ricky took one in the chops. Go back to the dock and unload some shit. It's 2020. And I’m gonna laugh at your fucking funerals which is gonna be great. Play the fucking records. Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. Fall out of one of those piece of shit buildings. Who’s he your dad or something? Also wtf is he talking about white women? That’s what happens when you stick in M&M’s store at Time Square. You can all lick my fucking red nuts. Things went south when the tour came to the Philadelphia. I’m gonna finish my set by takin this mic stand base like a fuckin disc. In 2006 Bill Burr and many of the regular comedians of The Opie & Anthony Show were on The Traveling Virus Comedy Tour, hitting large venues around the nation. [Bill Burr walks in and to the stage] [cheers and applause] Speaker Bill Burr: Thank you. I’m fucking trying to deal with this bullshit. You and your fuckin Donovan McNabb shirt. Goddamn lawn seats. But let’s go back in history here, okay? [boos] I figure anyone who gets into an SNL taping is connected some how and there for the experience. How did they get all the June? The only thing that’s gonna give it away is me laughing at you in the fucking background. Stops you from reproducing. Ah! They’re going after dead people now. Bill Burr Plows Ahead in SNL Monologue Charu Sinha 10/11 /2020 FDA promises no corners were cut in the quick OK of 1st U.S. COVID-19 vaccine Virgin Galactic aborts test in … What do you think about that? However, Burr would not let the crowd get him like they did the previous acts and kept hammering the audience until some started to turn in his favor. Actor Bill Burr has been slammed after giving a controversial Saturday Night Live opening monologue, in which he took on topics including cancel culture. That I really feel great. Bill Burr's "SNL" opening monologue received mixed reactions, but the comedian's fans were already prepared for his blunt comedic style. You keep it simple. I hope the glass gets fuckin into your fuckin shoulder blades and then I see you afterwards “Hey how’s it going” [simulates slapping a good friend in the back] Enjoy the fuckin show? That felt great. The last two minutes is gonna be my rider for the rest of this fucking tour. It’s literally a dream come true. Larry the Cable Guy is back to Git R Done. That’s the first time I said cunt. “Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. And then somehow white women swung their Gucci booted feet over the fence of oppression and stuck themselves at the front of the line. That’s what these people sounded like.” You never talk to your grandparents and brought up the wrong subject? I’ll probably get canceled for doing that joke. He’s not here. The next day somebody’s mopping up the 3 pounds of fucking brains that are actually left in this goddamn crowd. Booing Dom Irerra. NEW! Somehow there’s another dick in there for you to suck. Oh Fuck all you people you ya know what you fucking losers, I hope you all fucking die, and I hope those fucking Eagles never win the Superbowl. 1 month ago I heard some rumblings that this was some ghastly meltdown or highly controversial. 4 minutes left To fuckin talk about you CUNTS. Thank you very much. That night Burr became the tamer of unruly audiences and earned an incredible amount of respect from comedians and working class audiences that now adore him. I hope your mother has herpes in the center of her asshole and you go home tonight and lick it and get it on your tongue and some other horrific shit happens that involves cancer – all of you. Bunch of goddamn fucking losers. He said things that we avoid talking about in … Burr ripped cancel culture coming for John Wayne, white women hijacking the “woke movement,” gay pride month in New York and much more. I hope the cheese melts your faces off. I’d grab you buy the fuckin hair but you don’t have any. Went to the Banana Republic, picked a 20 dollar shirt off the rack. Ploughing ahead, let’s talk white women here. Have a good night. Why don’t ya just get the fuckin Ice Capades down there you assholes. I hate this fuckin city. I never heard of it, right? That’s a little long, don’t you think? All of you collectively SUCK a FUCKIN DICK. Someone tell him calling women "bitches" isn't funny It's 2020. I figure anyone who gets into an SNL taping is connected some how and there for the experience. The month of June is gay pride month. Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Bill Burr. All of you. I don’t know. Original source: https://www.wackbag.com/threads/bill-burr-tirade-a-transcript.51531/, Your email address will not be published. Remember that had that whole season when they wore the slacks. That aint’ gonna work. © 2020 Scraps from the Loft. I really the title as “Bill Barr” and I was like wtf is he on SNL? OK. Everyone’s chained to their fuckin chairs and just start blowing your fucking brains out. City of Brotherly Love. In his second comedy special for EPIX, Craig Ferguson puts his sometimes cheeky, always irreverent spin on universal topics from sex and drugs to rock & roll-including his hilarious experiences with Mick Jagger and Kenny G. Kevin Hart serves up laughs and brick oven pizza from the comfort of his home, and dishes on male group chats, sex after 40 and life with COVID-19. I hate the way you eat with your little shitty ass subway. Why don’t you fucking build something for Joe Frazier. Go fuck yourselves. Fucking assholes. Never won shit, since fuckin Gerald Ford was in office. You’re gonna get fired for coming to work too late cause they’re not gonna notice that you have fucking bone marrow cancer. We got a great show for you guys everybody. I am so excited to be here. I just blow all your fuckin brains out. [applause] Thank you. I’m like, “Some people not using safe sex and making all these babies?” So, I finally walked up to this old New York door guy and I was just like, “Dude, what’s going on? He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. I wish I was on his fuckin tour right now. Read the transcript of Bill Burr stand-up monologue at the Saturday Night Live in October 2020. everything’s just pressed up, you can’t see anything. And then if you don’t wear a mask, that doesn’t bug me either. Thank you. Bill Burr [Starts with SNL monologue intro] [Cut to SNL stage] [Band is playing music] Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Bill Burr. #SNL — Lori (@LoriAndJava) October 11, 2020 Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. I hope there’s a line of all of you guys getting fuckin car jacked and they take out their big black dicks and they just shove them right in your fucking mouths. All of yas…can line up with your Harold Carmichael fuckin jerseys, and one at a time you can all suck my dick. Bill Burr had an amazing monologue on "Saturday Night Live." He ripped cancel culture coming for John Wayne and woke white women. You bunch of faggots. Like, “Why is it so crowded?” “It’s gay pride month.” “Oh! #billburr #snl There’s too many people. And this has always been a life long dream of mine to come here and host Saturday Night Live. They’re trying to cancel John Wayne. Keep listening to them. I hope I hit a baby in the fuckin head. Yes. I hope that bridge collapses onto your pathetic lives. Never passed the fuckin 8th grade. Each and every one of you and somehow they just keep repeatedly cumming right in your fucking eyeballs, so that it builds up so much that your eyes fucking crust over. Fun isn’t it. And it was about that for about 8 seconds. I guess my grandparents were older. Fucking standing backstage for 3 hours to get booed by this GED fuckin stupid-ass piece of shit fuckin crowd. It’s June. New York is back, baby. Fucking goddamn losers. I’ve never heard so much complaining in my life from white women. Give them the sun for 31 days. That’s all I got left. What’s with all these people here?” And he was just like, “Oh, no, no. You got fuckin Joe Frazier is from there but he’s black so you can’t fuckin deal with him, so you make a fucking statue for some 3 ft fuckin Italian you stupid philly cheese-eatin fucking jackasses. New York is back. I have been doing stand-up forever. Your accomplishments over the last few years. Everybody’s shivering. I wanna thank you guys for having me. Wearing a grey face covering, the 52-year-old comedian hosted the second episode of … I still fuckin hate you people. Roland Gabriel running around without a fuckin helmet. Original air date: October 10, 2020 Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and white Makes me feel comfortable that you’re wearing masks. That fuckin pussy team. Thank you. 8 Minutes I’m doin it all. Bill Burr scores valid points on canceling the crop while trying to cancel ALL IN SIGHT. I don’t know. Bill Burr's SNL monologue was funny and appropriate. That’s good. Say it. You’re in the front row, you dumb fuck. 6 Minutes left and I will be selling my CD after this shit you mother fuckers [CHEERS] and the only way one you’re getting one is if I throw one at your fuckin stupid heads. By the time the 12 minute set (which Burr counted down every passing minute) was over, much of the crowd gave the comedian a standing ovation. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. I don’t. What are you taking a picture of E-Rock? Fucking warehouse working, weed smoking, fucking disappointment to your mother. The Flyers. I hope that happens to you. You won one fucking world series since 1880. You fucking one bridge having piece of shit city that no one gives a fuck about. You are this high above New Orleans. SNL's Bill Burr / Jack White Monologue | Saturday Night Live SNL's Today 10/10/2020 Don’t worry. They get 28 days of overcast weather. Fucking Rocky is your hero. And I hadn’t been here for like, 13 years and I immediately noticed how extra crowded this city was. Fuck all of you. This is probably the funniest SNL Monologue in a long time and it is no surprise that it offended the Twitter community. CLEARLY it was the first Bill Burr experience for some people. 0% body fat. You fucking bunch of losers with your fucking cellphone pictures Fucking suck a dick. How stupid is that cancel thing? Take out your grandparents. You can’t see shit. FEMA would never show up for you fuckin’ assholes. Please stick around, we’ll be right back. I like people who wear masks. I have a little fuckin cane now. Oh suck a dick. Comedian Bill Burr has come under fire for his monologue on Saturday Night Live this week. Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and white women.Saturday Night Live. And then somebody gives you that little nugget of information that just pulls it back? Does it really have to come to this people? What about not fucking interrupting me you jackass. That’s not bad 12 minute rant. Anyway, I don’t know. Bunch of fucking losers. Fuckin be up here talking about Hitler. Shall we? Some other shit-assed team that’s never gonna win a championship. This is right here is the theme of my set – a broken mic stand. I had to buy a fuckin shirt for this shit. The universe has to balance itself. Getting booed by people sittin in the fucking grass. Dude I think he can win! From the jump, the unruly Philly crowd set the tone of the night by booing the first comedian off the stage and then proceeded to give hell to all other comedians on the bill. Amazing. It had to happen. It’s your decision. Thank you. What the fuck am I gonna do at this point. Suck a dick. And Twitter took the bait. Go fuck yourselves. Let’s talk white women. Someone tell him calling women "bitches" isn't funny #SNL I got one first. Fucking antennas go right in your fucking ears. They’re all up in arms. Alright, that’s all my time. For a group of people that were never enslaved? Jack White is here. That’s what you did. You have a soccer team? The whole pride of your city is built around a fuckin guy who doesn’t even exist. What else what else. 3 minutes left of this motherfuckin tirade. Bill Burr: Snl Monologue (2020) – Transcript November 5, 2020 Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the "woke" white women. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. Does it really have to come to this? 2 to the back of the head. And I’m doin ALL FUCKING SEVEN. Suck a dick. It’s a dream come true. Comedy is not for you. “Remain Seated,” his latest solo special, will show you why this Grammy nominated, multi-platinum recording artist, and Billboard award winner is at the top of his game. Yeah! I really hope that happens. How about you hook them up with July? Bunch of goddamn pansies. They’re literally running out of people to cancel. City started looking like a giant Bed Bath & Beyond, and then bam! No one gives a shit. Fuck all you motherfuckers and fuck the Flyers. Sun goes down at 4 in the afternoon. I was here last year. Just listened to Bill Burr's opening monologue on SNL, then checked the Bill Burr hashtag on Twitter. I SAID SUCK A DICK. And speaking of dreams come true, did you see Rick Moranis got sucker punched on the Upper West side? You guys stood by us toxic white males through centuries of our crimes against humanity, you rolled around in the blood money and occasionally when you wanted to sneak off and hook up with a black dude, if you got caught you said it wasn’t consensual. Jesus Christ the goddamn people on this show are givin me shit. Your fucking Rush T-Shirts that say I beat the shit out of my girlfriends. 2 MINUTES LEFT. It's 2020. All of you go fuck yourselves in your own assholes. It’s great. You haven’t won a SuperBowl since they had facemasks. White women, you’re amazing. Bunch of fucking losers. Then come up with jokes designed to prove that point. The Netflix star referred to white women as his “bitches” while claiming … You don’t bring up race or religion with your grandparents. Larry the Cable Guy – Remain Seated (2020) – Transcript, Craig Ferguson: Just Being Honest (2015) – Transcript, Kevin Hart: Zero F**ks Given (2020) – Transcript, Sam Morril: I Got This (2020) – Transcript. Two guys kissing. You guys all look like surgeons with your masks on. I’m fuckin standing here. The one fuckin kid that would actually go to college in this fucking crowd. Alright? So anyways back to the joke. What’s left, the Phillies that faggot ass team named named after a female horse. I would really enjoy blowing everbody’s fucking brains out. I really hope all of you run into all those black people that you love so much here in Camden. Throw out some topics Let’s talk about heart disease, something you’re all gonna fuckin die of. When the artist before him was booed off the stage, Burr decided to go on the offensive. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Bill Burr didn't hold back in his controversial opening " Saturday Night Live " monologue. I hope somebody takes a fuckin beer stein and just slaps you in the back of your zit infested fucking shoulders and your awful man tits hang. - LinkedIn That’s what I do. Yeah. Bill Burr's opening monologue on 'SNL' draws praise, backlash on social media Burr’s opening monologue tackled everything from anti-maskers to cancel culture, from wokeness to … Sam Morril compares wearing a condom to doing volunteer work, wonders if murderers critique each other’s work and recalls befriending a vigilante in Cleveland. You’re listening to the egg heads, the people who we all cheated off of in high school, right? With your red candy-striped faggot fuckin uniforms. He was born in 1907. You guys were phenomenal [Crowd Cheers] Oh no.. Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. I got 4 minutes left. We lost our edge there for a minute. That’s a fucking record. Tank tops! Take out your weak cousin with the asthma. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features It aint’ ever happening. Oh!” I didn’t know that. Saturday marked his first time hosting SNL, and it's fair to say it's divided opinion. I hope you go 0-15. Yeah, had a great time. Things went south when the tour came to the Philadelphia. Suck a fuckin dick. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Weekend Update: Brett Kavanaugh and Dr. Ford Testify: Season 44 Episode 1, Weekend Update on the Government Shutdown, SNL Transcripts: Tom Brady: 04/16/05: Tom Brady’s Falafel City, SNL Transcripts: Chris Pratt: 09/27/14: NFL on CBS. Your email address will not be published. BILL BURR: SNL MONOLOGUE (2020) – TRANSCRIPT Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the “woke” white women. Your team should be selling cotton candy in the fucking instructional league. What brilliant shit are you gonna fuckin tell me? Just to refresh your memory, the ‘woke’ movement was supposed to be about people of color not getting opportunities, things that they deserve, finally making that happen. 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